Heh, I’ve been getting a kick out of this for the past half-hour. Mostly cuz I have a fetish with ontology and this is like a poor man’s poetic version. Following is the original post in alt.religion.kibology, by Inflatable Space Bunny. On a completely unrelated note, here is the Canadian band known as Fractal Pattern, since I am too lazy to find an image to accompany this post that somehow reflects both fractals and Canada…


Given a community A and an adjacent community C, such that A is prosperous and populous, and C is less populous and prosperous, and nonreciprocal interest of C in the internal affairs of A, often C will need ego compensation by occasional noisy and noisome display of its superiority over A. In this case C is said to be the _canada_ of A, C = canada(A).

For example, it has been previously established that

        canada(California) = Oregon
        canada(New York) = New Hampshire
        canada(Australia) = New Zealand
        canada(England) = Scotland

The Fractal Theory of Canada.

        For all A there exists C such that

        C = canada(A)

For example,
        canada(USA) = Canada
        canada(Canada) = Québec
        canada(Québec) = Céline Dion

It would appear that the hierarchy would bottom out an individual. However an individual is actually a community of tissues, tissues of cells, cells of molecules, and so forth down into the quantum froth.

        canada(brain) = pineal gland
        canada(intestines) = colon
        canada(electron) = neutrino

and so on. There is no bottom.

"My God! It’s full of Canadas!"